Psychology 101

To ruminate on causes does not move one forward in the land of the living, but to be aware of causes is helpful in knowing and being true to oneself. Both denial and absorption are extremes to be avoided. Denying is when we try to live in a way that covers what we don’t want to feel or acknowledge. It is a false life because it is disconnected from the self and the blows of life it has received. Absorption is when we become so connected with our experience and feelings that we can’t see beyond them to the experience and feelings of others. This does not mean that there are times when we genuinely can’t see past our own selves. For example, if someone were hurt in an accident and in severe pain, you wouldn’t expect them to be able to think past that in unrealistic ways. You wouldn’t expect them, at that moment, to be able to care about someone else’s hang nail when they have a compound fracture. But in life in general (in the absence of trauma or in the recovery of), being self absorbed can be just as detrimental as being in denial. In denial we repel others. In absorption we drain them.